Crossing Off a Bucket List Item: Running a 5k!

I don't remember when it was that I decided I wanted to run a 5k. I hate running. I'm really not a fan of exercise in general, but I do it because it's good for my body and it tones my muscles, making me look and feel better. So it's quite a shock (believe me) for me to say that running a 5k is a bucket list item I'd like to check off.

I don't even have a written down bucket list. It's more of something that's in my head. And I can't even think of many items that would make the bucket list. But, nevertheless, running a 5k is on it for sure. Up until this point though, it was something I wanted to do, and imagined I'd do eventually. It's as though a 5k run would magically happen to me, like when my tooth fell out, or when my boobs became boobs.

I've been invited to run with people or as part of a group for a long time. Roy's boss does the Gate River Run and the Mud Run and has been asking us to join him for some time. I've been invited to join 5ks for Race for the Cure. But I always made excuses, the biggest one being "I haven't trained to run a 5k, so I can't." But then I wouldn't train! Ugh. Isn't that annoying?

On Facebook last week, I saw advertisements for The Color Run 5k coming up in February 2014, and I knew that was going to be my first 5k. Well, it may be my only 5k, but my bucket list doesn't say I'd like to run ALL THE 5Ks! It's just I want to run a full 5k without keeling over and dying slowly while other runners stampede over my lifeless body. Or just Run a 5k for short. So I finally did it: I started my 5k training with Roy this morning. I downloaded a free app on my iPhone called C25K Free and it's set up to give you a training regimen you follow three days a week for 9 weeks.

During the first week, you begin each training session by walking briskly for five minutes, followed by alternating between 60 seconds of jogging and 90 seconds of walking; eight reps each. Then there's a five minute cool-down, which totals 30 minutes. The second week's training begins with five minutes of brisk walking, followed by an increased jogging time of 90 seconds and an increased walking time of 2 minutes; six reps each and totaling 31 minutes. And so each week, the jogging time increases until your lungs and legs are ready to take you to the 3.1 miles, or 5k finish line.

I told Roy I'm hesitant to believe I can actually do this, because I was never able to run so much as a mile in gym class, even though we ran everyday for an entire semester (18 weeks). I have half the time now (9 weeks) to run three times the amount I did in gym class. (3+ miles). I don't know if I can do it. Currently, my state of mind is that my body is weird, and maybe my bone structure is off, and I'm simply not built to be a runner. But, I used to say my body could never be a size 2 because I have 'child bearing hips' and that turned out to be a lie. Once I got on the healthy food bandwagon, and shed 40 pounds, I also shed much of those so called 'child bearing hips'.

I never thought I could love vegetables as much as I do, and that I could drink black coffee and enjoy it. I never thought I could eat a salad without first drowning it in a pool of ranch dressing and I never thought I could go two full years without a Big Mac and not care. So, I'm going to use that same mentality and hope to one day say "I never thought I could run a 5k, and now I love running!" I wanna be that girl! I wanna be that person I used to think was crazy for running in short shorts in January, or at 7 o'clock in the morning on a Saturday. I wanna be able to go out and enjoy splurging on a nice Italian pasta dish, and not worry about it because I know I'll use up the fuel later. I wanna have sexy legs and thighs that don't itch immensely during runs. I want a butt that isn't deflated. I want that "euphoria" runners are always talking about. I want runner's high. I want to talk about how I beat my time from my last run. I want to change the things I want, and want what's actually good for me.

You could say I'm starting my New Year's Resolution early. I just don't want to wait until next year. I want it now. I want it yesterday. So I'm going for it today. I signed up for The Color Run this morning and I'm going to do this thing, even if it means I will end up walking half of the 5k. My goal is to run the entire thing the entire way. And damnit, I'm going to do it. If it won't be my first 5k, it'll be my second one, or my third. But I will do it.

If anyone has any tips for me, I'd love to hear it. Particularly what I can do about itchy thighs! What's up with that anyway? As if running wasn't hard enough, I feel like I have poison ivy halfway through. Oy.

Til next time!

-Kale Queen

Experimentation: A Three Course Fully Squashy Meal

As the title suggests, I decided to cook up a huge meal consisting of some type of squash as the main ingredient for an appetizer, entree and dessert. The pictures are abhorrent, and again wine was involved, so please forgive me for taking photos of everything after half of it was already chewed up and digested. I really need to get better about that. We were all so merry and drinking wine that I completely forgot about taking photos for my blog post until after I'd already desecrated each entree. The reason for the jolliness was not just because the food was so amazing (even though it was). We were also celebrating Roy's sister Jennifer's birthday! I decided our family dinner night would be a great opportunity to cook a fully vegan dinner and to get feedback on the different recipes I was trying. And since Jennifer was born in the fall season, I thought it would be perfect to use fall seasonal produce.


The first step was to create a menu. I opted for a Thai Curry and Coconut Butternut Squash Soup, followed by Spaghetti Squash Spaghetti (or as you may now know it, my Lasagna Cake), and ending on a sweet note with Grain Free Pumpkin Bars with an icing you may remember from my By Accident Sugar Cookie Kale Chips Recipe. I'll explain...

For the butternut squash soup, I didn't follow the recipe entirely. The changes I made are as follows:

1. I didn't have kaffir lime leaves and had no idea where to buy them.
2. I used coconut oil instead of grapeseed oil.
3. I added a lot more than 1-2 tsp of the thai red curry paste because we all agreed the soup needed more kick
4. While I did roast the butternut squash, and sauteed the onion, ginger and garlic, once those items were done cooking, I threw all the ingredients into my Vitamix and blended for fifteen minutes at a pretty high variable (7-10). 

Blending the soup!

After 15 minutes of blending, the soup was piping hot, and I added what I felt was missing from the flavor; more thai curry paste, more salt, some fresh ginger, etc. I had everyone do a taste test until they all agreed the soup absolutely positively could not be better. I agreed. It was heaven. And the color is so gorgeous, like a setting golden sun. Ahh...

You may be able to see from the picture that I served the soup topped with roasted pepitas (pumpkin seeds) and cilantro. I highly recommend the cilantro. I found so many recipes of butternut squash soup, and everyone uses something different. You'll find everything from popcorn to pomegranate
seeds to almond slivers. But trust me on this one, add the chopped up cilantro.

Thai Curry and Coconut Butternut Squash Soup topped with pepitas and cilantro

Here's my recipe, adapted from eclecticcook.com (who adapted it from disneyfamily.com).

Thai Curry and Coconut Butternut Squash Soup
Adapted from eclecticcook.com

1 large butternut squash, about 2 pounds
1 tbsp oil, I used  coconut oil
¼ cup onion, minced
1 TBS freshly grated ginger
2 cloves garlic
1-2 TBS Thai Red Curry paste (+ or - depending on your heat preference)
4 cups chicken broth
14 oz coconut milk (I used Silk brand Coconut Milk)
1 tsp salt (I used Himalayan Sea Salt)
2 TBS freshly squeezed lime juice
Cilantro, chopped (for garnish. Optional but highly recommended)
Pepitas (for garnish)

Preheat over to 400°F. Cut the squash in half lengthwise and remove the seeds. Brush the cut sides of the squash with oil and place cut side down on a baking sheet or baking tin.  Roast for 45 minutes to 1 hour or until very tender. The squash should have a creamy texture. Once the squash has cooled enough to handle, scoop the flesh out of the peel using a spoon.
 

Sauté onion, garlic and ginger until lightly brown. 

Add scooped out butternut squash flesh into the blender, along with sauteed onion, garlic and ginger. Blend

Add in remaining ingredients (except for the pepitas and cilantro, as they are your garnish). Blend for fifteen minutes or so, checking on it every so often. Taste the soup, and add any additional spices as you see fit. 

Serve, top with pepitas and cilantro. Enjoy!

I won't go into details about the making of the spaghetti squash spaghetti, AKA my Lasagna Cake, because I've already covered it in my previous post. I will say, however, that everyone loved it. I witnessed family members going for seconds, so that's like, a big deal. Right? The spaghetti went really well with wine, so that's also a bonus. And a bigger bonus is, no one felt bloated or guilty. I didn't add the cheese this time, so it was even healthier than the original Lasagna Cake I made. I'll throw in a picture here, but the camera just wasn't doing it justice. I hope it still looks as delicious as it tasted!!!

Spaghetti Squash Spaghetti AKA Lasagna Cake

Moving onward to ... drumroll please... the dessert! Yes, it's the last item on the menu, and it's still vegan, it's still healthy, and it's made of squash! Cue the Grain Free Pumpkin Bars! Yay!!!

I only changed one item from the original recipe because I swapped the honey for agave syrup like I always do. Also, I didn't follow the suggested "icing" for the cake and instead opted to make my own. I even went the extra mile of making my own almond butter, instead of buying a can of it at the store. 

Making your own almond butter is super easy as long as you have the right tools (a powerful blender like the Vitamix) and you learn the tricks. I had to do some research and when I tried making almond butter the first time, I succeeded in five minutes.

All you need are almonds, but HEAT THEM UP FIRST! This is so important, and I'm sorry for shouting that out at you, but I wanted to make sure you were paying attention. When the almonds are heated up, they release the oils quicker and easier (which means you won't have to add additional oil/liquid to get that buttery consistency!) Do not throw a bunch of almonds in your Vitamix two seconds after taking them out of the fridge (if that's where you keep them.) You can roast them for ten minutes, or do what I did, which is to toss them in the dehydrator for 20-30 minutes at 130°F. Once they're warmed up, toss the almonds into your Vitamix, start at Variable 1 and blend. In a minute or two, you'll move it up to Variable 3, and use your tamper to move the almonds around or push the crumbles down toward the blades. This process shouldn't take longer than 10 minutes, but I had a half a cup of almond butter made in five minutes. 

Once I had the almond butter made, I mixed it in with the pumpkin puree, agave, eggs, spices, baking soda and vanilla extract, and then baked the mixture. While it was baking, I set off to create my icing. If you've ever looked at my blog post about the Sugar Cookie Kale Chips, you'll find my icing inspiration right there! It's all vegan, and yummy yummy. 

The Kale Queen's Sugar Cookie Glaze

1/2 cup almond milk
1/2 cup cashews, soaked
5 medjool dates, soaked
1 TBS chia seeds
1 tsp vanilla extract

2 tsp coconut oil
1/2 tsp Himalayan pink sea salt.
1/2 TBS cinnamon

Blend all ingredients. Pour out on top of Grain Free Pumpkin Bars and serve.

The icing paired so well with the pumpkin bars. I'll probably use this icing recipe on muffins, pancakes, and any other healthy pastry I might make. It's sinfully sweet, minus the sin. Haha!

Oh yeah! I should take pictures of the pumpkin bars before it's all gobbled up!

So there you have it! A fully vegan, fully squashtastic meal that you don't have to feel guilty eating. I think it still surprises me that vegetables can be eaten as dessert and taste amazing. And yes, I categorize pumpkins (and tomatoes!) as vegetables, regardless of their scientific identity. It took me a long time before I considered healthy food anything other than cardboard bran. I hope that anyone who reads my blog realizes that it's possible to eat healthy AND yummy without sacrificing on either one. 

I hope you've enjoyed this menu, and again, I apologize for the photos. I will try to do better next time. Til then, maybe you can let me know your outcome with this menu! 

-Kale Queen

Autumnal Adventures! Lasagna Cake and other Creations

Happy fall everyone! It's officially here! The weather is getting cooler. Pumpkin Spice Lattes are back. (Hooray!) Magazines are displaying pictures of women in boots, and I've already seen three girls rocking out crochet hats. And of course, every store is filled with Halloween candy.

I'll admit, I used to not be a big fan of the fall. Even though my birthday is in October, and I love Halloween, and my boots, and PSLs, and jeans, I don't love the eerie looking squash and pumpkins that have started showing up at grocery stores and farmers' markets.

Well, I didn't love them. But my mission is to start! And I can already feel the sparks flying.

The main reason I didn't like these freakish gourds was because I had no idea what to do with them. Pumpkin pie can be made with canned pumpkin pie filling. But what's that goopy mess inside the pumpkin used for? And what about those seeds? And what about that hard shell of the spaghetti squash? Do you wash it? Do you cut it? Do you take a sledgehammer to the rind? (I contemplated that before I simply asked Roy to use his manly power to cut all of them open for me.)

Anyway, everyone has to start somewhere. I used to not know how to cook anything. (Well, unless you count adding water to the fill-line of the microwavable mac n cheese containers...) So I thought, surely I can figure out how to master the butternut squash, the pumpkin, the spaghetti squash, and all those other weird bumpy circular heavy things invading the grocery aisles.

I started with the spaghetti squash and have made two different meal varieties following recipes I found on Pinterest. The first was a Spaghetti Squash Au Gratin with Caramelized Onions I thought would be like mac n cheese. I'll say it's less like mac and more like cheesy hash. Nevertheless, the recipe ROCKED. I took it to a family dinner and it was quickly gobbled down, so it's a winner.

I had to take a bite... then realized I had to take a picture!

The second time I tried spaghetti squash, I followed most of the recipe from the aforementioned Au Gratin recipe, but instead of adding cheese and Greek Yogurt, I topped the spaghetti squash with some Bertolli spaghetti sauce and chopped up some leftover chicken sausages we had from a pool party the night before. Then I baked this "casserole" for half an hour at 375° and topped it with some mozzarella cheese. Roy loved it, and said he still couldn't come to terms he was eating a new vegetable that he liked. Roy's almost 15-year-old picky-eater teenaged son, David, gobbled down half of the entire tray that I made. He even came up with a name for it: Lasagna Cake. I'll take it. (Note: I didn't tell David he was eating spaghetti squash instead of actual pasta. Some things are better left unsaid...)

So here is the recipe for...

Lasagna Cake

1 medium spaghetti squash

1 medium onion, diced

2 TBSbutter

2 cloves garlic, minced

1/2 tsp salt (+/- to taste)

1/2 tsp black pepper

1 cup your favorite spaghetti sauce (homemade or store bought)

1/2 cup mozzarella cheese

1 TBS olive oil 

2 tsp oregano

2 tsp thyme

Preheat oven to 375°. 

Cut squash lengthwise. Scrape out the seeds. Salt the flesh of the squash and wipe some olive oil on it. Grab baking dish and add enough water to cover the bottom of the dish. Place spaghetti squash face-down. Bake for 45 minutes. 

While squash is baking, caramelize onions and garlic with butter. Add salt and black pepper. Remove from heat once onions are light brown. Remove from heat and set aside.

Once squash is done baking, remove from oven and let cool down a few minutes so you can handle it while scraping the flesh. Add spaghetti squash 'noodles' to an oven-safe casserole dish. Spread out caramelized onions and garlic on top. Add tomato sauce and cheese and mix up to spread sauce evenly. Top with oregano and thyme. 

Put Lasagna Cake back into the oven for 30 minutes. After that, remove from oven, let cool slightly, and enjoy!

Lasagna Cake!

As for those weird seeds you'll find in all sorts of squashes, you can do what I did with them. First, remove all the weird stringy madness from around the seeds. This may be a little bit time consuming, because the seeds are super slippery, but work through it to get all the seeds untangled, and then wash them. Pat them dry with a paper towel, and then put the seeds in a baking tin and spray with oil. I used truffle oil. We have one of those spritzy sprayers that provide a more uniformed coating of oil. (I use it when I make popcorn too!) You can find them anywhere, and I bought ours for 10 bucks at TJ Maxx. If you don't have a sprayer, just coat the seeds anyway you can in the oil of your choice, and then salt them before popping the baking tin in the oven for 15 minutes at 400°. If you're like me and you like really toasted brown seeds, leave them in for longer, but first shuffle the seeds around so they're not just toasting on one side. Once they're done, enjoy! I eat the seed whole, without taking off the shell. I don't think there are any problems with that, but you do as you wish. 

My goal is to go on Pinterest and find more recipes that are autumnal. One such recipe is the

Turkey, Wild Rice, Apple, and Cranberry Stuffed Pumpkins but I might skip out on the wild rice and just use turkey, apples and cranberries. Maybe I'll substitute spaghetti squash for the rice! I haven't yet decided but it's on my autumn food bucket list!

What autumn veggies have you used so far? Lemme know about it!

Til next time

-Kale Queen

Banana Nut Pancakes

 

You know how it's called comfort food because it's meant to be comforting and yummy and feel-good? Well you also know comfort food is a big no no when you're trying to stay healthy and keep your bikini from being your worst nightmare. I am always trying to find ways to make compromises so I can keep my bikini body AND my insatiable appetite in sync. So, here is another recipe that is guaranteed to make you happy (so long as you like bananas.)

A friend of mine recently posted a recipe on Facebook about having made pancakes using only two ingredients: one banana and two eggs. (Hey Alice!) Naturally, I was slightly skeptical and also very intrigued, so I had to make them. 

Roy's birthday was this past Sunday, and since we have his kids with us this summer, I thought it'd be nice to treat them all to some yummy cinnamon roll pancakes; a recipe I found on Pinterest. (When I told Roy about them, he said: "They're not just sin. They're the express train to hell pancakes.") Now, that recipe is absolutely deliciously disastrous for your waist as well as most of your internal organs, but hey, you gotta live a little. I informed the kids that had they known me during "Flabby Gabby Days," we'd all be well on our way into daily diabetic shocks. But since Flabby Gabby turned into Skinny Minnie, thankfully that won't be happening. Once in awhile however, I allow them all to indulge, and I thought Roy's birthday would be the perfect opportunity. I won't be going into the cinnamon roll pancakes, but I will post a lovely photo of them and all their cinnamony glory. Yummo.

Roy's Birthday Cinnamon Roll Pancakes

For myself though, I thought it'd be a great opportunity to try out those banana pancakes Alice posted. It was simple enough. I threw a super ripe banana into the Vitamix along with two eggs, blended, and poured the batter into the skillet. I'll say it was a bit of a nightmare to flip the banana pancakes, but I managed to do it, and we all nommed on our breakfast happily. While I ate, I imagined all the ways I could improve the two-ingredient recipe, and this morning I tested out my plan.

I blended a banana and two eggs, and then added some cinnamon and nutmeg to the blender. Once it was blended, I added about a quarter of a cup of raw walnuts, and pulsed a few times to chop up the walnuts but not puree. Then, remembering the difficulty I had flipping the pancakes on Sunday, I made small silver-dollar-sized pancakes. They sizzled and bubbled, and flipped relatively easily with my spatula. The smell was amazing, and it smelled like a fresh baked banana nut loaf coming out of the oven. Mmmm mmmmm. I used a little bit of agave as my maple syrup stand-in because I didn't have any maple syrup (we didn't buy any for the cinnamon roll pancakes because they didn't require any since they're topped with a cream cheese icing). The result was amazeballs. Truly, amazingly delicious. And zero guilt. AND zero bloat! I ate a plateful of these delicious pancakes and didn't feel like I needed a nap afterward. And no, it didn't taste like a banana omelet. The egg and banana mixture make that fluffy consistency you get with regular flour pancakes, and neither flavor overpowers the other. The ratio of one banana to two eggs is perfect. I do wish they wouldn't fall apart quite so easily, but that's why I recommend making smaller pancakes. Plus, they look so cute and it's the perfect bite-size pancake.

Perfect silver-dollar-sized pancakes

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did. Kudos to Alice for posting on her Facebook wall about these. I'd otherwise have never found out about them! Let me know if you think of some other flavor enhancers for these bad boys. I am definitely going to be playing around with a blueberry pancake idea shortly. I'll keep you posted!

Til next time!

-Kale Queen

Peanut Butter, Powdered Peanut Butter, and that other Inspired-By-Peanut-Butter stuff

 

I have so many recipes I want to share and often times, there are ingredients that appear more often than others. Powdered peanut butter is one such ingredient, especially in my kale shakes. Chocolate peanut butter, banana peanut butter, strawberry peanut butter, peanut butter mocha... If you can't tell, I love peanut butter.

During the year I was losing weight, I had peanut butter at my desk, and if I was in the mood to nosh, I'd grab a spoonful of natural crunchy peanut butter. I could have eaten the entire container really, but at 190 - 200 calories for two tablespoons, that wasn't gonna happen.

Back then, I didn't know a thing about powdered peanut butter. Now, you'll see many recipes I post contain PB2 or JustGreatStuff as an ingredient, and I realized that YOU may not know what it is. So to that point, I'm going to spend this entire post on the three peanut butters you may or may not be familiar with.

The first is your standard Jif, Planters or Skippy peanut butter. For this particular post, I will reference Planters Natural Peanut Butter, because that's what I had on hand. You can see the serving size for the Planters is 2 TBS. There are 190 calories; 150 of which are from fat. The ingredients aren't bad, as there's nothing I can't pronounce. But there is sugar added. The overall taste is great of course. Did I mention I'm a peanut butter fiend? Fiend I tell you, FIEND!

When I started losing weight, I realized I couldn't be gobbling down vast amounts of peanut butter, and when I found what I call the "inspired by peanut butter" stuff, I bought it to give it a try. The "stuff" I'm talking about is Walden Farms Whipped Peanut Spread, and I bought the jar because it says it's sugar free, calorie free and fat free. This was back before I paid too much attention to the ingredients of things, and instead focused on those glamorous words "calorie free" and "fat free." You can see from the photo I took of the nutrition label on the back of the jar how UN-nutritious it really was. The ingredients list has Yellow #5, sodium benzoate, FD & C (????). So in other words, ingredients that I can barely pronounce and have no idea about. There's also that keen little line below the ingredients that says "*Contains Trace Calories" so it's not as calorie free as I thought it was. I am wondering how it's calorie free at all! What sort of black magic is this that with so many ingredients, this has no fat, no calories and no sugar? Most importantly though, the taste was horrendous. I imagine sometimes, when my dog has that really runny, goopy, what-the-hell-did-you-eat?!, yellow-brownish diarrhea, it would taste similar to this peanut spread. I'm sorry to tell you that. Really truly, I hope you weren't eating or drinking something when you read that last bit. But if I can save anyone from this revulsion, then it was worth it.

 

Moving on. I had googled tons of recipes online and diet tips and tricks. I read about PB2 and found out that it supposedly tastes just like peanut butter, but it's a peanut powder, and it has 85% less fat than regular peanut butter because the oil has been removed. I was skeptical, because this is my  post-traumatic-stress-from-inspired-by-peanut-butter-self. But, I kept reading more and more about it, and the reviews I read were pretty much the same. Most people loved the stuff in their shakes, or mixed with water and eaten in more traditional ways (PB&J, or PB and celery sticks.)

I happened to see a health food store near our house on a trip to the grocery store, so we stopped by. They didn't have PB2, but the lady told me they did have Betty Lou's JustGreatStuff Organic Powdered Peanut Butter. So I brought it home, fell in love, and we lived happily ever after. The end.

Well, I'm still in ever after actually. And you deserve to know about it! I did end up buying PB2 later on, and I have both at home now. They taste almost identical to me but there are differences on the nutrition label. PB2 has 2 grams of fiber, whereas JustGreatStuff has 1 gram. PB2 also has 5 grams of protein as opposed to JustGreatStuff's 4 grams. What I like though is that JustGreatStuff is sweetened with organic coconut sugar, while PB2 only mentions sugar. Either way, they're both great and taste amazing and make me sing with happiness that in 2 TBS, there's only 45 calories compared to regular peanut butter's 190. And only about 10 - 13 calories are from fat, compared to regular peanut butter's 150.

I feel like powdered peanut butter is just another reason to believe in humanity. Somebody somewhere loved peanut butter as much as I do, and decided that poor shmucks like me who are trying desperately to shed some poundage deserve low fat and low calorie peanut butter. And then, they made it!

Anyway, I use PB2 or JustGreatStuff for any recipes that call for peanut butter. Sometimes, I'll admit, it's better to just use the regular peanut butter. For instance, I made peanut butter cookies that use garbanzo beans instead of flour, eggs, etc. The first time I made them, I used natural peanut butter because I wasn't home and I didn't have PB2 on hand. They were amazing, but with so much peanut butter in them, I knew I couldn't indulge quite as much as I would have wanted to. A few days later, when I was home, I tried the recipe again with PB2 instead of peanut butter. The cookies came out terrible. They essentially tasted like garbanzo bean cookies with a hint of peanut butter. Yuck. I will try them with half and half next time. Half fully oiled up peanut butter, half PB2.

They sure do look yummy, but I assure you, they weren't...

Mostly though, the PB2 is a wonderful substitute for the good stuff. I made a phad thai with zucchini noodles and veggies. The peanut sauce was perfect and the entire meal felt light, but was filling. I also add PB2 to shakes, and have created some yummy flavor combinations: PB & Banana. PB & J (just add strawberries, powdered peanut butter, and a quarter of a frozen banana to your regular greens and blend!) And now, PB2 and JustGreatStuff offer a CHOCOLATE powdered peanut butter, so think of all the shake possibilities there! You could have a healthy vegan Reese's flavored kale shake!!!!

Chocolate PB2!!!

As I mentioned, I found JustGreatStuff at a health food store, and I hate to say that it's not available everywhere. I know our GNC has PB2. I've never found PB2 or JustGreatStuff at any regular grocery store, even though they've gotten on the health bandwagon and have cashew butter, almond butter, coconut butter, etc. Isn't that weird? I'd recommend you purchase PB2 or JustGreatStuff online, because it's cheaper and you don't have to drive around town looking for a place that carries them. 

I'd love to hear from you if you use PB2 or JustGreatStuff. What are your favorite recipes?

Dear Skinny Bitches

Well hello again. I have been so crazy busy lately, I hope you all forgive me for my brief hiatus. I got engaged! So naturally, I'm reading other blogs, going on Pinterest, and discussing wedding plans with all my friends and family.

I have actually been working on another blog post which is almost done, but I had to put that aside because there was something extremely important on my mind and I absolutely have to get this out in writing. If you never read another blog post of mine, read this one before you write me off entirely.

The other day, I casually skimmed through my news feed on Facebook to get the latest scoop about the goings-on of my not-so-inner circle. A "friend" of mine (I will refrain from naming her, but not for the fear that she'll see this; I've since unfriended her) posted a status update that caught my attention. She wrote, and I quote: "If you really can't handle the first half of spin class without fans on, then you probably should reconsider working out altogether." Two of her charming friends responded to her status update. The first said: "People that use fans to work out should reconsider working out." The second friend, evidently a woman of few words wrote simply: "PREACH!"

I read it over and over, and came up with a dozen responses in my head of things I would have liked to say. I'll admit, most of the things I wanted to write were laden with profanity, but I willed myself to write, gently and eloquently so as to get my point across, "ouch. People have to start somewhere :-/"

Circa 2007, not yet at my heaviest

I'll be honest. I really thought that maybe since I had not written the expletive-ridden torrent I had intended to spill, some cosmic karma voodoo magicalness would swarm all over their pretty blonde heads and, oh I dunno, give them a reality check, or maybe some common decency, or a bit of heart. I waited patiently for the notification icon to pop up letting me know a new response had been added, but nothing came. After a few hours, I checked her page again, thinking maybe the notification popped up and I had missed it. I found the status entry, and instead of three comments underneath, found only two. She had deleted my comment...

 So here is the actual beginning of my long spiel. Buckle your seat-belts but don't go anywhere. This is where you're probably wondering why the hell I care what some "skinny bitch" said on her own Facebook wall. After all, she didn't go and blast it on some forum (as far as I know.) She also has every right to use her first amendment right to be as much of a bitch as she wants. She's not hurting anyone, technically. But oh my God, did it hurt like hell. I'll admit it.

2009. I was 22 years old

This all takes me back to when I was "Flabby Gabby." When I hated going to the gym and being around skinny girls who I swear gave me dirty looks. Was it my own imagination that the gorgeous, fit girls were judging me while I struggled on the treadmill? Maybe. It might have been in my head that they were secretly laughing at me or looking at how revolting my belly and thighs looked. Everywhere I looked, people were scoping out other people. Quick peeks, strange glances, all of which I imagined were for comparison. My legs are so much better than hers. Her butt looks amazing. OMG that girl's hips are so wide; glad I don't look like that. When I made fleeting eye contact with another person, I over-analyzed what they must have seen and thought about me: that I'm just a gross fat girl who should just give up. My so-called friend's status update validated every fear I ever had.

I used to always "cover" myself with purses, or in this case, a pillow to hide...

My ex-boyfriend's father once said I would always be a fat girl. I remember the first time a girl at school matter-of-factly referred to me as 'chubby'. And it was someone in my used-to-be-inner-circle who dubbed me Flabby Gabby. And you know what? That whole bullshit about using the negative comments as fuel to prove people wrong NEVER FUCKING WORKED. Oh, I'd think it all right, in my head, it was all, I'll show them! I'll lose this weight and be so hot they'll be sorry. But it never happened. I went home and scarfed my heart out on whatever was in the fridge. You say I needed better friends? You betcha.

Visiting my family in AZ in 2009

The first step on my path of transformation really did involve removing myself from the bad, negative, hurtful, detrimental people. The second step was surrounding myself with people who motivated me, encouraged me, told me I was beautiful no matter what, and loved me for me regardless of the size of my jeans.

2010. The most I ever weighed. I wore a size 10-11 at 5' tall and 140ish lbs

I needed some serious prodding to get back in the gym, and it only happened after I lost my first twenty pounds. Even then, I stayed for ten minutes. That included getting a paper cup of water and slowly ambling toward the "death machines."

I can't even imagine what would have happened if someone laughed at me about that, or if I overheard some girl snidely remarking "that girl who barely worked out for ten minutes should just reconsider working out altogether." I would have quit. I would have been defeated. Am I proud about that? No, not really, but I'm being blatantly honest. I would not have come back, because there'd be no way to get up to "her workout standards" overnight, and subjecting myself to that kind of bullying would be too difficult. I already endured enough bullying in grade school for being too short, having the wrong haircut, wearing cheap clothes, having crooked teeth and "four eyes." In those days, I had no choice but to go to school and be subjected to the brutality. As an adult though, it's a different battlefield, and I can choose whether or not I want to fight in it.

Down 40 lbs!

I would have walked away...

Hiking. Look at those guns!

I'm so grateful that I made it to my goal, and have successfully kept off the weight for two years now. My self confidence has never been higher, and I actually feel pretty. It's not just because I'm thinner. It's also because I worked so hard, didn't give up, and achieved something I never thought I could. I am so proud of myself! That's why when anyone tells me they'd like to lose weight or get healthier, I do anything I can to help them, motivate and encourage them, and answer all their questions. That's why I started this blog! I wanted it to be easier for you guys to find my favorite recipes, tips and exercises that helped me lose weight!

No witchcraft here. Just positive energy, motivation and hard work!

I hope what you take from this blog post and what you remember most is that I started out as Flabby Gabby who ate macaroni and cheese daily, hated exercise, and was constantly derailed from improving my life by the negativity around me. But I slowly made the changes to my diet, and I took those scary steps into the gym. I thrived because of the positivity around me and avoided people and situations that would hinder me. My ten minutes on the elliptical the first day turned into fifteen and then thirty. Now, I can ride that sucker for an hour like a boss. And I'm down forty pounds.


And you know what? I use the damn fans.

Snorkeling during my last vacation. #nofilter #nophotoshop #thatsmybody

Chocolate Banana Crepes with Strawberry Peanut Butter Cream

Yes, this was my breakfast. No, I will not have to make an appointment at the gym to burn off 1000 calories or mope around the house that my thighs will inflate from such a carb loaded breakfast. Ya know why? Because these are guilt free, sugar free, flour free, thigh-inflating free scrumptious crepes! No I'm not lying to you. There were no magical fairies with pixie dust harmed in the making of this dish. Have I captured your attention? Well alright then!

Last night, after yet another Pinterest fueled evening, I stumbled upon a magnificent blog, The Rawtarian, and found a super easy, two ingredient recipe for dehydrated banana crepes. The making of the crepes took about two minutes and fifteen seconds, and I was back to Pinterest before the couch cushions had time to cool off from my warm butt.

The recipe was simple: Blend 8 ripe bananas with 1/2 cup of water, pour mixture on teflex sheet of a dehydrator tray, dehydrate. The first hour, you dehydrate at 125º F, and then you lower the temperature to 105º F for about 8 hours.

crepe puddles going into the dehydrator

I, of course, have a hard time following recipes to a T, and didn't want to make quite a large batch, so I blended two bananas with a splash of chocolate coconut water. I added in a small scoop of chia seeds, turned on the blender for another two seconds to mix in the chia seeds, and then poured out the mixture in seven small circular puddles on the sheets. I used a plastic spatula to even out the puddles and make a consistent thinness. I have no idea how thin they were but my guess is they were only a 1/16th of an inch. You know what? Scrap that. Just thin it out. We're making crepes here!



Chocolate coconut water is my new favorite thing. It's like non-toxic Yoo Hoo

The crepes were dehydrating for an hour at 125º, and when my timer went off, I turned down the heat to 105º. I watched over them every few hours, and when I was able to peel them off the sheet, I did so carefully, flipped them, and continued dehydrating. I made sure they weren't getting too dry, and finally removed the crepes when they were solidified, pliable and still somewhat sticky. Then, I placed a crepe on a ceramic plate, and layered the seven crepes between pieces of Saran Wrap so they wouldn't be one congealed mess when I was ready to eat them. Viola, and into the fridge they went until morning.

As someone who comes from a Russian family, crepes were often served at breakfast time when I was a kid. They're called blini, and they are conventionally made with eggs and flour. Once they're ready to be eaten, they're topped with sour cream and jam, and then rolled up using the teeth of a fork. Crepes were my breakfast of choice, and as a kid, I didn't have to worry about calorie count and carbs. As an adult whose thighs inflate just from SMELLING bread, crepes have since exited my breakfast menu, and are left at simply being a fond memory.

So naturally, I was super excited to make raw crepes, and of course had no intention other than eating them the way I always have, albeit with minor modifications.

This morning, I removed the crepes from the fridge, along with my tub of Greek yogurt, and grabbed a bag of frozen strawberries from the freezer.

The Greek yogurt would be my stand-in for sour cream, and I had to figure out a way to make the jam. I scooped up 1/4 cup of frozen strawberries and tossed them in the Vitamix, added a splash of water and about 1/2 - 1 TBS PB2, my favorite non-butter peanut butter. Blend blend blend, and I had myself a strawberry peanut butter creamy sauce. It definitely wasn't the consistency of jam, so I'll have to work on that, but it was still really yummy. I grabbed a banana crepe which had time to warm up some from the fridge, scooped on a heaping teaspoon of Greek yogurt, and poured the strawberry cream sauce on top. Then, I rolled it by hand, crepe style.

This is definitely something you don't want to eat with your hands (like I did with the first one before I grabbed a knife and fork) because it's going to be a sticky mess. The banana crepe was very much like a fruit roll-up, sticky and sweet, so the crepe held together effortlessly. The taste was amazing. The chocolate banana flavor went so well with the strawberry peanut butter, and the Greek yogurt was a perfect player in this sweet flavor combination.

I gobbled down two crepes, and an hour later ate a crepe by itself, in all its fruit roll-up glory.

This recipe can easily be modified to a vegan recipe by switching out the Greek yogurt for a vegan alternative, like cashew cream or nut butters. I'm not a vegan though so my personal recipes will probably never exclude meat and dairy, and I'm not a raw eater so I will always have recipes with non-raw ingredients. Not every single recipe but, you know... Some.

I will definitely be making these crepes again with different flavors. Roy is not a fan of the banana, so I will have to figure out a different flavor for him. I'll keep you posted about my picky eater. For now, I can't say I'm too disheartened; it just means I don't have to share! Mwahahahaha

I hope you enjoy these as much as I did!

Love always

-Kale Queen